I had it all planned. Not a single detail had been left out.. He would approach him and, simply, I would tell him. So, without further ado. And let it be what God wants, thought. If you accept it willingly, well better. And if not, don't do it, I don't mind, it was said. I was fed up and it was time to make a firm decision.. It was very likely that, at first, would regret. After all, Any change involved taking a risk., but that shouldn't have, I couldn't, it was said, stop him. It was neither fair to him nor to the other party involved..
I had waited a long time. First of all, it was too early.. Then, what if it wasn't the right time. The thing is that, by H or by B, I always ended up postponing the matter. And it cannot be said that he was an indecisive person or that he doubted more than was reasonable., or so he thought. It was just that the time they had been together, le pesaba. It wasn't so much because I had a debt with the other party., like the ballast of affection and trust that had been established between the two after so many years. Quieras reconocerlo o no, after so many experiences, of so many comings and goings, ups and downs, de tantas complicaciones, There was a bond between them that could not be broken just like that.. But we had to look to the future. He couldn't stay anchored like that, I had to look for new opportunities to prosper.
Y que sí, that deep down he already knew that the other was not going to take it well, was repeated. But, was it his fault? Pues tampoco. He had always done his part, from the first day, and hey, if the other did not accept it, what could i do? Nothing. But it is that, Of course, if I didn't have that character. The character always lost it. Those outbursts of anger that came out when something upset him, They weren't normal either., the truth. I had told him many times, and the other had answered yes, But there were things he said that shouldn't be taken so seriously.. Total, We all have some defect or another and, in part, I was right about that.. He also had his own and, if I thought about it, There were also many things I could blame him for., if I wanted. So long steering the same ship, It was enough to point out faults and errors almost in equal parts. But not, The time had come to leave everything and start again., thought. but then, the disease came and everything stopped.
I was angry. But, angry with who? with himself? With your partner? Had it been destiny, are karma, doom? for a moment, He wanted to imagine what everything was like before the epidemic. It had only been three weeks and, however, It seemed like months had passed.. Or years. How naive I was then., thought, suddenly. Anxious about deadlines, it came to be said, “this will not come here”. I was sure that, then, when all that was over or passed by, he would forget what he was experiencing in the same way that he had forgotten now, almost completely, what was your previous life like. for a moment, He understood how things should be in a war. one day you had a life, with its problems and ups and downs, it's true, but a life with projects, a future, and the next, nothing had the slightest importance. Like your plan. And it had happened now, precisely, just when they had granted him that credit. Now that I finally had the money, The clients had regretted it and had backed out., leaving him hanging. Was that fair?, it was said, again. ¡No!, of course not. It wasn't fair at all. But, What was fair in this case?? What did justice have to do with your situation?? Why did he insist so much on weighing everything through that prism?? The fair and the unfair implied a structure, a system, an organized regime of obligations and duties, but there was nothing of that here. It had happened, that's all. At last, convinced, He wanted to put those thoughts out of his head.. But he couldn't. Fuck, now that I had decided, it was said. what bad luck. And there it started again.
I had it all planned… GERARDO LEÓN
